Falling Down isn’t a racist movie… Michael Douglas’ character is an equal opportunity vigilante who also goes after whites, Hispanics, and a neo-nazi asshole! Probably one of the best movies he’s ever been in. I’m posting this because his answer to his own question is pretty funny.
(for the record, an actual Korean wouldn’t say “fi”, he would say “pie-buh”)
I vaguely recall promising updates and photos ‘n shit… that’s probably not gonna happen. Well it might, but I dunno when. Right now I’m just here to post this hilarious Japanese commercial which was brought to my attention by my friend Clayton who now lives in Japan. Are all Japanese commercials this awesome? I dunno! I’m just going to assume they are.
Well I’ve spent the past 2+ weeks in the Chicago area (and North Carolina and Wisconsin) and it’s been productive! The main goal was to do the annual fishing trip with Dad & bro, but before we packed the car with beer, food, and $3 fishing lures I did some running around which I think has paid off:
Bought all kinds of shit to take back to Korea… bedding, kitchen tools, a kickass Logitech Performance MX wireless mouse, and a bunch of business-related books
Spent a day with a super nice Mexican lady who taught me how to make tacos and green/red hot sauce
Reconnected with some friends from my days of working at Spiegel Outlet Store about 500 years ago
Visited mom in NC, and she tried really hard to teach me how to swing a golf club so I can stick it to Ben and Lee the next time we play screen golf in Seoul
The highlight was catching 19 fish in Wisconsin, which is 19 more than I caught last year… but of course Pat managed to catch 23. Dick! Ok my fish count wasn’t really THE highlight… that honor belongs to my dad who reeled in the biggest goddam fish any one of us has ever caught! Dad actually caught TWO northern pikes, but the second one was kind of puny compared to his first. Nice job, old man!
Holy shit, Dad!
I’m a rugged outdoorsman
Pat needs cushions in the canoe or his hemorrhoids really flare up!
Dad's second northern pike wasn't as big as the first but it wasn't too shabby
In this boat you keep your head down or take a hook in the mouth yourself!
Pat caught the mother of all fish... the mother of the ones he caught earlier, that is
This little bastard fought harder than the big pike
Geez Pat, is there enough room in your house to hang all these trophy fish?
And now it's time for Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey
I make out with every fish just a little before throwing it back
Unhooking a catfish without murdering it is a delicate process
Pat rushed this one to the taxidermist to have it mounted
The best way to unhook a fish is to rip its guts out with a pair of pliers! Take it easy PETA, I'm j/k
For you white folks who don’t get the joke, “dae han min gook” is the Korean way of saying “Korea”, and it’s also what you’ll hear people chanting during World Cup games.
The other night I was watching Korea vs. Nigeria at 3:30 am and after halftime I took Terry down the street to watch the game at a chicken hof (a place that serves beer & fried chicken) where I got drunk and Terry caught the attention of some lady and her moderately-doable friend’s cleavage! Good boy, now find me some girls who are 10 years younger…
Cory and Sarah were in town last week so they came over to eat watermelon and provide background commentary for the long-awaited video tour of my, uh, “crib”. Do people still use that word?
This place is pretty sweet… I’ve got a dishwasher which is pretty unheard of in Korea, and the washing machine also dries! I don’t even own a drying rack. The crown jewel of this place is, of course, the smoking lounge! Or the big TV on the wall? Eh, let’s call it a tie.
A few weeks ago I went to Dongdaemun (big shopping area) with Alaska Jae and Jisun and we went on Disco Jump! It’s this nutty ride that spins around and bounces while you hold on for dear life. The guy who operates it is pretty sadistic and was way more aggressive with the spinning and bouncing than he was in this video below. Fast forward to about 1:00 to hear him laughing hysterically at a guy who’s bouncing on top of his girlfriend.
Alaska and Jisun both fell into the middle, and if the guy hadn’t eased up I would have gone flying, too.